Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Holiday Parenting: It's the Overall that Matters, Not the Everything

Temptation at three

This morning I noticed my six-year-old son eating his cereal two inches away from two sprinkle contains left over from cookie decorating last night. He didn't notice them, or if he did, he didn't care. I told him, "boy you sure are growing up. Do you remember three years ago when you stole the red sprinkle bottle off the counter and hid behind the couch eating it?" "Oh yes," he said fondly. He would of been three when I found him there all red faced and hands. I think there is still a hint of a red stain on the carpet.

Tonight, I was eating out by myself with my kids. And I was asking my boy about school. He doesn't usually say much. I ask a lot of questions. Today, because my husband wasn't there I pried a little more. He said, "I wanted to tell you something. Someone was teasing me today." He looked a little hurt. We talked about it. It didn't seem like a big deal to me, just someone at school saying his name silly all day. But he did seemed quite bothered.

I loved that he shared this with me. I remember always bottling up things and not being able to talk to adults and probably making things into a bigger deal than it was.

I try my hardest at this parenting thing, but its a tough job. I lose my cool. I called my son "difficult" twice or maybe three times the other day between after school and bedtime. (But man, sometimes he is just so so so difficult for the sake of being difficult!) It was the way I said it. And I hate that I did. I mean, I barely saw him yesterday. I'm the jerk.

When I feel like my son and I are getting into a rough patch, I make a point to do something special with him where we can have great together moments. Even if its just going out to eat. That helps. And at the end of the day, maintaining an overall positive loving connection I think is what matter. Its the overall, not the everything that matters. Or at least that is how I maintain my sanity!

Eating out having fun with jello

Namaste and may you find grace and peace admits a stressful time of year!

No comments:

Post a Comment