Sunday, February 6, 2011

Family Creation Day 2: Is it Worth It?

It's the second Sunday of our new family "Creation Day", where we all try to be a little more creative, especially as a family. Already it feels like a pain-in-the-asana instead of the inspiring, fun, Brady Bunch-esq moments that it was supposed to be.

The day ended on a good note: as a whole family we danced while laughing and interacting together, danced in our own worlds, and flowed in and out of the two letting our body's loose!

However, the morning was a different story. The leader of the day woke up on the wrong side of the bed. She spent the majority of the morning entertaining her son while wishing desperately to be left alone to loose herself in a book, or online, or in some other meaningless task so that she wouldn't be face-to-face with how grumpy and completely wiped out she was feeling at that particular moment.

Okay it was me. And I'm blaming it on the glass (okay two) of red wine I had last night in a reckless adult moment in between the baby crying.

Of course, when I want to be left alone to my grumpiness, my son instinctually ramps up his need for high-power-interaction. This creates a drama cycle between us that by afternoon spirals out of control. When it finally came time to create our new "show", my heart was not in it. It didn't contain the exhilarating excitement of spontaneity that creating something together had last week.

Last week we were in sync. We brainstormed with gusto. Everything each other suggested seemed like sheer brilliance! We were rocking! We were on fire!

This week, creating a drama was just sheer, well, drama.There was the bickering over costumes, "no, we need actual costumes, not pretend costumes."
"Why?"
"Because we are creating a real show. And it is more fun with real costumes."
"Oh, but I don't wanna wear a costume."
"But you have to!"

And more bickering over story lines.
"No, you can't run down the hall into your room. The audience can't see you when you go into your room."

(Me growing weary and tired of this already) "at some point, you know, you have to surrender."
"Why?"
"Well, we have to actually END this show. We can't go on fighting and fighting, and escaping from jail and escaping from jail all day. You are the bad guy. I am the good guy. I have to win at some point."

Next the rehearsal dramas,
"No, that is not how we did it last time. You have to run away first, and then the second time we fight..."

And then,
"Get back here! Get out of your room! I just told you...."

Now ready to finally present the skit to dad:
"Put on your bandanna!"
"I don't wanna wear it!"
"But it looks so cute! Bandits always wear bandanna."
Sulking, and reluctantly he puts it on.

Dad comes in the living room to watch. We are ready to present. Baby wakes up and screams and I have to stop to feed her. My son sulks and takes off his bandanna. I cringe.

Okay, we are really ready now.
Part 1 commences and the Bakery Bandit Boy enters stage left. (It is his big debut. He has his intro line that we have been practicing. He forgets it. I prompt him from the side).

Without enthusiasm he says, "I am the Bakery Bandit, and I am going to steal all these pies." He starts to put the pies in his bag and I, the sheriff, enter on my horse: "AH HA! I will get you!" and off runs Bakery Bandit Boy to his room, where upon he slams the door. He is supposed to run away and then come immediately back while I hide in the Bakery.

He doesn't come back.

We wait.

We wait some more....

He has locked himself in his room.

He cannot get out.

How many times have I told him not to lock his door. 

How many times have I given him lessons on how to unlock the door.


It was the straw that broke this (non)yogi's back. I left him there and went downstairs to relish in my grumpiness alone.

Oh the drama.

Thankfully our libra friend Stephanie came over to visit, bringing with her a happy peaceful energy enough to squeeze peace from the grumpiest of grumpy scorpio families.

My son and I finally apologized to one another. After bribing him with a piece of Stephanie's cookie, my son reluctantly agreed to present the skit to our now doubled-sized audience. He said his lines without gusto again, but in no time, perked up and got into full Bandit power! He enacts the skits just how he is supposed to, even allowing me to capture him easily and finally win. We finish off our skit, relishing in the applause, bowing, and even smiling at each other and hugging with genuine happiness in our hearts.

Was it worth forcing myself to create the skit even though my heart wasn't in it? The show must go on right? I am not sure it was worth all the drama. I think next time, I need to somehow rejuvenate myself, maybe with a quick five minute breathing exercise, or something, in order to regain my center.

I am the parent after all. It is I who has the greatest influence on the outcome. I know I could of easily turned the whole thing around if I was more centered - ie more patient, compassionate, better at listening to his needs and compromising. I was just trying to muscle through and ended up setting off land-mind after land-mind with my own mind not in the right place.

This creating stuff is easy when you are in the mood. It is hell when you are not. I sympathize for real artists!

Redemption

After a not-so-quick solo trip to the grocery store by yours truly, followed by a nice dinner, our family reconvened in the rec room ready to let loose. Hubs selected the music, and together we let the music feed us until our bodies moved, our hearts shone and laughter left our lips.

Let's Dance!
(No babies were harmed in the taking of this photo)

Together we swam like we were underwater, galloped around in circles like horses, created crazy spazzed out dance moves, and let our body loose! We danced interacting together, and we dance in our own worlds, flowing in and out of the two.

It was so freeing to just let go and dance uninhibited. At one point, I got so into the Jamiroquai song I choose, reliving my clubbing days, that I didn't even notice I was dancing hardcore all by myself while the boys had temporarily left the room. Part of me didn't want to stop dancing, I was having so much fun.

Dare I say, even my reluctant husband had a blast dancing around with us. And you know what, with my whole heart, I loved-every-minute. It was a simple thing to do, and it only lasted for three songs (everyone picked one song), but it brought us all together for a moment in time.

And with that, I am satisfied that our Family Creation Day #2 wasn't a complete drama downer after all.

Read about our first Family Sunday Creation Day.

1 comment:

  1. Very interesting read and it made me laugh and smile a lot! Thank you for sharing :) And I think you are one awesome Mom, (as well as a great writer,) with such a creative energy and passion for your children.

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